Happy Birthday to me!
If I keep saying it to myself, maybe I’ll feel it. Don’t get me wrong, today was fine. Some friends came over. We had a meal together, spent some time talking, I even had a cake. When it was all over, however, my life had changed.
Now I’m sitting in a little room in an Inn, all by myself. Beside me are three boxes of stuff – all the things I have to show for my twenty-one years of life. I knew I was going to have to go out on my own soon, but I didn’t know I would be shown the door on my birthday.
I’m not bitter – the last eleven year with Master Gees have been great – it’s just a bit strange. A little over eleven years ago I was alone on the street, and here I am again. Admittedly this time I’ll be able to take care of my self more easily.
I have so much to look forward to – my whole life – I should be happy. Maybe I Just need to look at things differently. My life is so much better than it was eleven years ago. Let’s see:
1) I can take care of myself – I can fight.
2) I have friends – good friends.
3) I have some gold in my pocket.
4) I have food in my tummy.
5) I have some skills – I can get a Job.
6) I believe in myself – I know I can do it.
Looks like a pretty good list, so why am I sad? Change? Loss? Uncertainty? Maybe all three. I do like my life ordered and I do like my routine. My nice predictable life is over. I miss Master. It’s only been six hours, but I missed our talk this evening, and even getting him his tea. And lastly, I have no Idea what tomorrow will bring. I have to find a place to live, find a job, and figure out what to do with all the hours of my day.
I guess I should go to sleep – tomorrow will be the beginning of a new adventure. Things will probably look better in the morning light, at least I hope so.
Happy Birthday to me.
December 3rd, 2009 at 9:32 pm
[…] blogged about both her birthday and about looking for a new place to live. While she was feeling sorry fro herself, Hector […]